if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
and you fell through a lawn chair
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize
