Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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