I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
