she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
