I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
