i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
