Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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