i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Randomize
