So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
I understand Curling. That high.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
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