her vagine was all disorganized.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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