I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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