never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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