Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
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