How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Randomize
