Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
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