just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Randomize
