My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
He felt like a one man threesome
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
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