I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
