I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
