just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
