I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
