I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
handjob tips. give me some.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Randomize
