whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
