Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
