My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
