It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Randomize
