My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
