Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
