i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
