It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
