both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
