saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize