You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
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