im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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