it wasn't lemon gatorade
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
