My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
