dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
