i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Randomize
