I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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