I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
