just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
