Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Randomize
