Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
