BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
