my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
