I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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