would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
