Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Operation Purity has been aborted
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Randomize
