Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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