I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
